tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-51503787626123873802012-01-13T10:49:57.570+04:00Daily humour about friends and familyEternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.comBlogger1841100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-44012565161694514822011-10-23T14:33:00.000+04:002011-10-23T14:33:55.852+04:00

I'm the sole carer to the real life Edina Monsoon.  A woman who subcribes to every trend that arises, a self proclaimed Buddhist and a feng shui enthusiast who aspires to move in the highest circles of creativity, fashion and celebrity.  A woman who cannot allow a drink to pass her lips unless it costs more than a months rent and most importantly a woman who is only happy when all eyes are on her

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com24tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-26200769946872372182011-08-23T15:11:00.000+04:002011-08-23T15:11:07.975+04:00

This is the final instalment of Granny's last holiday.  For part 1 click here.  Part 2 click here.  Part 3 click here. @font-face { font-family: "Cambria"; }p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal { margin: 0cm 0cm 10pt; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman"; }div.Section1 { page: Section1; } The last day with Granny started early.  She has spent the month in my bedroom

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com21tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-69330559698505894982011-08-16T14:37:00.000+04:002011-08-16T14:37:27.064+04:00

This is the third installment of The Silver Surfer’s visit. For part 1 click here. For part two click here. I‘ve never met anyone who eats more bread than Granny Annie and Uncle George. Every day a new loaf is opened and panic sets in over breakfast. They share out slices, setting aside lunchtime rations, snacks, supper and another slice or two ‘just in case’. Seemingly it isn’t worth

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com22tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-69448085090894645722011-08-07T11:39:00.000+04:002011-08-07T11:40:03.435+04:00

@font-face { font-family: "Cambria"; }p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal { margin: 0cm 0cm 10pt; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman"; }div.Section1 { page: Section1;First I need to point out that Granny and Uncle are not here at the moment, my last post and the next one or two are stories from their visit in February… It has taken me that long to get over it! She will be back

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-43995818686917847492011-08-01T11:21:00.005+04:002011-08-01T11:31:18.069+04:00

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Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com20tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-88984125241675041102010-09-12T10:46:00.004+04:002010-09-12T12:08:56.915+04:00

A few million, trillion years ago I started this here blog. I followed the rules and found myself a place in the blogosphere worthy of a couch potato with a fast disappearing waistline. I tapped away on the keyboard, ciggy in one hand, coffee in the other, eagerly splashing my life across t'internet. I only ever had one golden rule: Remember that my wee Scottish Granny reads every post and

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com101tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-16678461952420869532010-09-05T09:02:00.012+04:002010-09-05T12:57:03.643+04:00

Someone else said those words a million times better than me. She earned a trillion dollars, enjoyed more than one worldwide tour and somewhere along the line picked up a husband that my heart won't allow me to talk about... Despite all of that I'm not dead either.I've had emails to ask if I've run away with the milkman - obviously this is not true. The second part of his name should be a

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com61tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-50873786058472084232010-07-26T10:47:00.000+04:002010-07-26T10:47:17.919+04:00

Seventeen days, three hours, forty minutes and 20 seconds from now I am going home. Home to the land of butter, Jeremy Kyle, Scottish sausage and Irn Bru. Home to a place where men wear skirts and everyone has red hair. Home to hours of rain, cold and fluffy slippers. Home to meet a willy flashing monster.Meet Rocky. Apparently he is my new 'little' brother. My old 'little' brother sadly

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com90tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-6370503350132814942010-07-20T11:26:00.000+04:002010-07-20T11:26:21.924+04:00

*Sigh* I am no longer anonymous.McGillicutty from Inner Rambling of a Mid Life Mama has discovered my true identity and is threatening to tell all unless I pay her twenty cazillion, megazillion buckarooneys. I have tried to find the money and save myself but it's absolutely impossible. I've begged and pleaded, screamed and cried, stamped my feet and sold my body twice but I'm still forty

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com75tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-61528956905895781262010-07-18T10:00:00.000+04:002010-07-18T10:00:34.247+04:00

We arrived in Crete and hired a an old Jeep with no roof swanky convertible and headed for the hotel Thelma and Louise stylee (minus Brad Pitt). Having no idea where you're going matters not when you are driving an upside down pram amazing soft top.We arrived at the hotel and met the owner who was to become our new Greek Dad, Nikos. He was especially pleased that Mec could speak Greek and from

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com53tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-75686783371885134092010-07-15T11:15:00.000+04:002010-07-15T11:17:28.944+04:00

I had not realised how long I had been in the Middle East until I landed in Greece and everybody was naked. I thoroughly enjoyed my holiday.The End.I was able to eat bacon sandwiches without taking a personal loan. I had pork for breakfast, lunch and dinner and still had enough money to buy an 'I love Crete' t-shirt. I was amazed to see people drinking beer in the street and felt it was only

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com32tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-39734401567904686202010-07-14T09:56:00.000+04:002010-07-14T09:56:56.430+04:00

I knew we had returned to the Middle East when I overheard two men at the airport asking for a better price on the drinks they were purchasing at Costa Coffee. The poor cashier tried desperately to explain that the prices were fixed, this didn't deter the men in their search for the 'best, last price'. Welcome home.It took twenty minutes for the first person to call me 'Sir', an all time record.

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com37tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-56187024123875549332010-07-10T13:44:00.000+04:002010-07-10T13:44:00.042+04:00

We have been a little worried about our home alone man so today we checked in on him. It seems he is having a whale of a time, playing on his guitar...having friends around for a little boogie...and it seems he has got himself a boyfriend.I told him that we loved and missed him and he screamed "You're embarrassing me in front of my friends Mum..." and then he hung up :0(He is sooooo gonna be

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com45tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-67147820228083022362010-07-07T13:16:00.001+04:002010-07-07T13:16:00.088+04:00

I'm trying hard to get around to this blogging malarky, I really am. Unfortunately some things are just more important. Have you any idea how essential it is for Brits to come back from a holiday looking like a lobster with peeling skin? Nope? Well it is. To complete my holiday mission I am currently hereand tomorrow I'll be here...I'll be back soon.Maybe.

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com43tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-90286559532114805322010-07-01T18:00:00.001+04:002010-07-01T18:01:34.081+04:00

Twelve hours from now we will be on a plane heading for the sunshine. I understand It would be much cheaper and easier to open our front door and take in the rays but I much prefer the idea of traveling fourteen hours surrounded by strangers who will have colds, screaming kids and snoring problems... Exciting stuff! I will try to schedule some posts, but I'm lazy so no promises.I figure that I

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com53tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-24651362498271340912010-06-29T11:37:00.000+04:002010-06-29T11:37:22.734+04:00

I'm going to grab my ears firmly and remove my head from my ass - because I'm worried. I need to sort out this here blog sooner rather than later.I have had a wee peek at the stat counter again this morning and to tell you that I'm horrified is an understatement. No wonder my parents asked me to run away from home...I have always written with the knowledge that my wee, lovely jubbly, amazingly

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com60tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-67709297216891536782010-06-28T11:36:00.000+04:002010-06-28T11:36:18.972+04:00

Once again the England team have fallen flat on their faces. I can't be bothered to write about my raging disappointment or need to cry so I will focus on a happier time...Last weekend the Mad Italian (MI) invited Mec and I to bob around on the big blue sea in her boat. You never quite know what you are going to get with the vertically challenged European but you can always be sure of a story

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com46tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-74114884268423461042010-06-26T10:00:00.001+04:002010-06-26T10:02:13.498+04:00

I can only blame my absence on the fact that the football bug has got hold of me and is currently suffocating me slowly. England made it through, by the skin of their teeth. Either that or they heard the hysterical screaming coming from the bar we were in and were too terrified not to score. I am starting to understand why men say that women should not watch football... My experiences

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com64tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-58239436720255603532010-06-20T14:59:00.000+04:002010-06-20T14:59:23.634+04:00

The very bestest thing about school = School tripsThe very bestest thing about school trips = Coach journeyThe very bestest thing about not growing an inch since I was twelve was the fact that I was always the tallest. The tallest people ALWAYS get the back seat of the coach to share with their most fabulous friends. The back seat of the coach was ALWAYS the furthest away from the teachers.No

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com65tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-27465428806347149542010-06-19T08:31:00.000+04:002010-06-19T08:32:05.881+04:00

I think it's time we made a pact to find the creator of the weekend and kick his ass for his complete and utter stupidity (it has to be a man, right?). I'll never know why the idiot didn't push for more days, two is just not enough, there are seven days in a week, surely we should be entitled to at least three off?I have an additional gripe with this guy. Not only did he guarantee me just two

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com56tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-55287861474296276202010-06-16T02:46:00.001+04:002010-06-16T14:47:29.213+04:00

I hid my sexuality incredibly well for years. There was no way that anyone would have known that I was of the la la la la la la lesbian variety. Dungarees, Dr Marten boots and a skinhead helped my disguise, a token boyfriend or ten aided my skillful plan of never telling. I had it sussed, I was the best non lesbian ever.When I was sixteen a friend and I were highlighting each others hair in

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com81tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-14933326135972980782010-06-15T11:56:00.000+04:002010-06-15T11:56:22.941+04:00

I'm feelin' the love. You all sent splendiferously fabbarooney gifts after my last post and you'll be pleased to know that Mec and I have cashed them in. In two weeks time we will be hereand here...and here...Now I don't want you to worry about us, we will be fine. I admit it will be tough to stay up late and not have to set an alarm. Breakfast in bed is going to be a huge chore, I must

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com52tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-73875615640898636652010-06-13T14:43:00.001+04:002010-06-13T14:47:47.870+04:00

Eighteen months ago I started stalking you. I happily set up my own little surveillance camp and found blogger after blogger willing to share information about every aspect of their life. Amazingly I discovered a way to snoop that went way beyond curtain twitching and searching garbage listening to gossip. I spent six months secretly sneaking up on you before I decided that you were kind enough

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com92tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-64743370556333143942010-06-12T10:26:00.000+04:002010-06-12T10:27:00.360+04:00

Tempers, tantrums and tiaras.Living with Max is similar to spending time with a drag queen on speed. One minute he is cuddling up on the sofa telling us he loves us long time, the next he is running around the house tripping over his high heels and biting the toes of anyone close enough. He can fly but would prefer to believe he is human. We spend hours in front of him wildly flapping our arms

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com50tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-6807599154817240302010-06-09T10:56:00.000+04:002010-06-09T10:56:44.396+04:00

At fourteen you had the whole world ahead of you. You were doing well at school with parents that worshipped the ground you walked on. However, human nature makes us strive for more, makes us want bigger and better things and you were always looking for greener grass.You were expected home at 4pm. By 5pm your friends had been called and it seems that you hadn't gone to school that day. By 6pm

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com61tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-73048811248956199672010-06-07T14:10:00.000+04:002010-06-07T14:16:30.197+04:00

I first came to the Middle East in November 2000. My wee Scottish Granny wanted to visit her daughter (Aunty) and although my Mum had bought the ticket to go she seemingly lost her flight legs at some point before the plane was due to leave.Free ticket for me. Check.Once Aunty collected us we followed a true Scottish tradition and spent the journey from the airport discussing the evenings

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com58tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-70621092354264791512010-06-06T10:58:00.000+04:002010-06-06T11:00:18.491+04:00

The rain has stopped and the skies are blue. On Friday parts of town looked like this:Three years ago Oman suffered at the hands of Cyclone Gonu which caused heavy damage and many fatalities. Cyclone Phet caused widespread panic but it seems that lessons were learned and people were much more sensible in the rains, unfortunately deaths have been reported.The last few days have reminded me of

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com50tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-88026920269281482302010-06-03T15:12:00.000+04:002010-06-03T15:15:12.014+04:00

On Saturday I wrote this post.Cyclone Gonu hit Oman three years ago (almost to the day), now Cyclone Phet is on its way...Some days I wish I knew how to keep my mouth shut!Rest assured Aunty is safely tucked away in Bonnie Scotland, the clear up this time should involve a lot less champagne bottles and a little more order... fingers crossed.

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com42tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-14407705561672868842010-06-02T16:05:00.000+04:002010-06-02T16:10:41.174+04:00

The troublesome trio, previously mentioned in this post have landed in Bali. 'Winnie' because she has a scary obsession with Winnie the Pooh, 'Hatter' because she's seriously as mad as one and 'DJ' because she LOVES every single song ever made have gone on holiday together and I am honestly petrified that they are going to cause a riot.I met with the three girls before they left. Winnie and DJ

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com53tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-72017614829355045002010-05-30T16:09:00.001+04:002010-05-30T16:10:58.996+04:00

When it's 50c (122f) and feels like someone is blowing a hot hairdryer in your face the last thing you want to hear is that Bonnie Scotland is cold and lovely... I care not that Aunty has started her three month holiday and that she is already having a great time. I had secretly wished that she would have to share the plane journey with screaming children and perpetual sneezers but it seems

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com54tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-33256861302160069152010-05-25T14:32:00.000+04:002010-05-25T14:39:11.794+04:00

Dear Aunty Nasty,The day you stuck a bar of soap in my brothers mouth and held a toy gun to his head for swearing we made a secret pact to call you Aunty Nasty. My Mum joined our club the day that you were babysitting us - she left the house and had not made it to the end of the street before she realised she had forgotten something - even she was surprised that we had been sent to bed already,

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com53tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-17187511300975032162010-05-23T13:11:00.001+04:002010-05-23T13:12:27.683+04:00

Firstly I can't remember where the 'Wifey' bit came from... Was it because we have been best friends forever or maybe it was because your daughter, who was three at the time, proudly told her nursery teacher that "my Mummy has a wife"... I think I was more impressed with that than you but then I have lived a lot longer as a lesbian ;0) Eight years later I still refer to you my 'wifey'... are you

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com44tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-75848132506720815432010-05-19T12:31:00.004+04:002010-05-19T17:34:59.880+04:00

I thought that piercings for cars would be quite funky but my tyre didn't agree. It desperately tried to spit out the nail I had embedded so I had to call for a 'man that can'. Ordinarily I would be butch, roll up my sleeves and get stuck in to trying to fix the problem myself but today no one was looking and I didn't see the point of sweating for nothing.Ten minutes later and I was sitting in

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com48tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-46630620476771247372010-05-15T10:40:00.000+04:002010-05-15T10:40:39.490+04:00

Since my previous post Aunt has jumped up and down, kicked and screamed and protested that she is not as bad as I made her sound. She refuses to acknowledge that she is Edina Monsoon... although she happily agrees that I am Saffy! I have decided that until she admits to her champagne-swigging ways I will out her unruly ways...Three years ago a cyclone hit. We had been told to expect rain but as

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com64tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-8931547947186083622010-05-11T18:25:00.003+04:002010-05-11T18:25:00.233+04:00

I am chief care-giver to a champagne-swigging, prosperous but preposterous, fashion and fad-obsessed Aunty who is incapable of performing any domestic tasks. Of course I am the ever-virtuous, high-minded, intellectual, virginal niece who assumes the moral high ground and provides the voice of reason. As a result I am constantly getting her out of sticky situations like these:Chasing her around a

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com62tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-55356871251612135342010-05-10T17:47:00.000+04:002010-05-10T17:54:47.012+04:00

Mec: That man has no respect... he's irrespectableMe: He's what?Mec: He is respectlessgigglingMec: I don't know what the word is but I don't like himGranny, this one's for you...Auld Lang Syne was playing and Mec was trying to sing alongMe: You're just making those words upMec: I know, I don't understand the song, it's RussianMe: It's ScottishMec: No wonder I can't understand it...

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com47tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-14178307577932633162010-05-06T18:37:00.004+04:002010-05-06T18:37:00.832+04:00

I'm standing in a queue minding my own business and hear a women screaming at her child "if you don't stop crying, I'll give you something to cry about" ... so I go and jump on her head, recite the same lines to her and while she's sniveling in the corner I wonder where do these sayings come from?Ok, so I didn't really do that but there were many times as a was a kid that I secretly wished

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com76tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-48092342177084637862010-05-05T18:39:00.000+04:002010-05-05T18:39:00.858+04:00

When I was all fresh and new to all this blogging malarky I would return everyones comments at the end of every post. I stopped doing that a million trillion cazillion years ago because I. AM. LAZY.Now normally I don't update you because I can't be bothered like to keep you guessing but I have had a few comments recently asking if I still have orange hair. You will be please to know that I

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com55tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-16480375594140497972010-05-04T18:29:00.003+04:002010-05-04T18:29:00.355+04:00

Last night I walked into the house and couldn't find Mec. She eventually appeared from the kitchen with a broom in her hand.Mec: WHAT IS THIS??Points frantically at a mark on the tableMec: This, THIS, what is this?I start to panic looking for the right answerMe: Erm... it's a water stain...Mec: I KNOW it's a water stain...I'm not sure what was more disturbing, Mecs red face or the fact that

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com49tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-61631702166060145012010-05-03T18:15:00.003+04:002010-05-03T18:15:00.589+04:00

I have a need to share my love for Darren Shortty Shortt Shortt Shortt of HiFM... I have loved and stalked liked him for some time now and I think it is only fair that I involve you too. I know Max will be very upset that I have another man in my life but I have decided Max is my man with hair, Darren is my man without hair. Mec won't mind, she is too busy being the only women in my life.

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com44tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-21322087303469725892010-05-02T18:00:00.004+04:002010-05-02T18:00:04.326+04:00

I usually hate my hair being long but I was a big, strong girl and perservered for years weeks to try and let it grow. When I realised that I was never going to have Jennifer Aniston locks or body I decided enough was enough and went for my scare cut...Two hours later my hair was orange. Yep, ORANGE... This guy could be my twin (except I'd never wear a skirt!):Nice, don't ya think?I don't think

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com57tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-3586610076197921202010-05-01T15:27:00.000+04:002010-05-01T15:27:00.664+04:00

I know how you worry about Mec and I, that you are constantly wondering what we're up to, where we've been, if we're safe etc. This post should put your mind at rest.We only have one day off together every week and I would hate for you to think that we wasted it. You will be very pleased to know we spend it doing very important things... This week we achieved much:I mastered the art of standing

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com50tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-58632009681788410142010-05-01T06:28:00.000+04:002010-05-01T06:27:45.897+04:00

Whilst watching a sport programme....Mec: I don't like himMe: Why, you've never seen him before...Mec: I don't like his faceMe: What's wrong with his face?lots of thinking going on...Mec: You know I think he has underthingiesMe: Underthingies?Mec: Yeh, you know... underthingiesI try to change the subjectMec: You know he has things under him, he feels he is below everybody elseMe: So why

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com45tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-21984831284127840302010-04-27T14:10:00.000+04:002010-04-27T14:11:56.622+04:00

Today was a momentous day, I may still be dreaming so am writing this down quickly...I returned from work in time to make dinner. Although things looked a little strange in the house I couldn't put my finger on what was different so shrugged it off and continued to slave over the hot stove toaster. I reached out to collect the important cooking utensils butter knife and that's when I noticed...

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com62tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-37645212606838392272010-04-25T10:00:00.001+04:002010-04-25T10:05:18.193+04:00

Volcano ash may have granted us an extra five days but it still didn't seem long enough...Mornings are not the same without being confronted by a wee man shouting 'coco-pops please' whilst presenting me with his orange bowl. For two weeks I said 'are you sure you are going to eat them' and for two weeks he told me 'yes' as he took one spoonful and handed me the bowl back saying 'finished'...

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com61tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-63865959012824193522010-04-18T14:37:00.000+04:002010-04-18T14:41:18.927+04:00

Most holidays come and go in a flash leaving you wishing for one more minute, day or week... Well, my wishes have been granted - They are all still here! I don't want to gloat too much, all flights back to the UK are grounded and I'm sure that there are lots of people suffering badly as a result. However I am happy that I am being given the opportunity for more time.More time with bezzie who I

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com51tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-69885084001471983242010-04-17T15:49:00.000+04:002010-04-17T15:49:24.768+04:00

I had planned to wake up early to go to the airport, say a tearful goodbye and spend the afternoon drowning in my own tears.BUTTTTTThe plane has been delayed until...Who knows?!!Back to the pool for us and blogging malarky will have to wait until...Who knows?!!

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com32tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-76879836566544880032010-04-11T08:05:00.000+04:002010-04-11T08:05:45.720+04:00

The journey to the airport was stressful. Mec and I traveled in separate cars so that we had enough space for all five visitors, suitcases, buggies, child seats and kitchen sinks but I so wish Mec had been in the car with me. I swear I almost had twenty heart attacks during that ten minute journey... I would like to say that excitement got the better of me but that would be an understatement.It

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com53tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-39851408512240267672010-04-09T21:04:00.000+04:002010-04-09T21:06:19.850+04:00

Realising that I had not had an Easter Egg for years, I did not want to be deprived for a minute longer so Mec and I set out on the two minute walk long trek to the supermarket. As it is fast approaching forty degrees we carefully packed our chocolate heaven in amongst milk and red bull in the hope that the walk back would not end in a chocolate melted mess in the bottom of the bag.So I'm

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com56tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-51111169855367577862010-04-07T09:35:00.000+04:002010-04-07T09:36:55.963+04:00

Dear all,Mr gorgarooney Eddie Bluelights is very, very happy that you have all been over to see him at his place to read his roast (links below). He says he loves you all a million, trillion and would like to live happily ever after with every one of you. Remember if you haven't been to see him already go and do it now... How can you resist this face?I have not written anything for a few days

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com70tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-29527918264347454432010-04-02T11:08:00.000+04:002010-04-02T11:08:29.154+04:00

One of them is 32, the other is 2. They tag team against me, creating a wall of resistance against my OCD. I know that I only have two choices:1. Give in to an overwhelming need to scream and become an obsessive, scary person who rocks in the corner of the room.2. LaughThey got me...OCD = nilMec and Max = one(because I really wanted something am the loveliest girlfriend EVER I ran a bath for

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com61tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-46985570601721107172010-03-31T10:35:00.001+04:002010-03-31T10:37:55.850+04:00

Ooooo I'm so close to 500 followers I can almost smell that 500th person who is about to recieve a big snoggarooney from me...Five days. FIVE DAYS. Five more sleeps and I will be standing at the arrival gate of the airport in my incontinence pants crying and waiting for the big reunion...If I haven't mentioned it before I will have five visitors in FIVE days...... and my favourite five letter

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com65tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-54059318322396300642010-03-30T10:20:00.000+04:002010-03-30T10:24:47.730+04:00

Would it be bad to share with you that I am peeing my pants with excitement? Constantly. Literally. Like every minute of every day. I can't think straight or act it. I am driving everyone crazy... although that's fairly normal to be honest.In ONE week I will be sitting around the pool with my bestest friendest in the whole wide worldest. Playing with her three kids, drinking beer with her man

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com56tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-47291738534530057482010-03-29T09:40:00.000+04:002010-03-29T09:44:30.267+04:00

You should first understand that it doesn't matter how much alcohol you drink as a teenager you should NEVER fall asleep at a party. You should NEVER associate with other drunken teenagers and you should ALWAYS pay attention to your Mothers warnings about 'bad' friends.I woke in a drunken stupor and headed straight for the bathroom. One look in the mirror told me that there was something wrong.

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com66tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-84259668297525687892010-03-27T16:30:00.000+04:002010-03-27T16:35:31.169+04:00

Mecarooney,I was so very pleased with myself this morning for trying to sneak out of the bedroom without waking you. I almost made it. I am sure there was a freak wind that made the door slam because I tried so hard to be gentle.I was already worried I'd woken you when I made my way down the stairs. I couldn't believe that I had tried so hard to be quiet but still managed to make more noise

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com53tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-83209395442701560202010-03-26T14:05:00.000+04:002010-03-26T14:05:28.861+04:00

My name is Max and I am addicted to scrambled egg... I will jump, run and dance for it. I have no shame. I admit that scrambled eggs have taken over my life but I just don't care. Give me a human to make it and I'm a happy, happy boy.

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com53tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-51191806796488850052010-03-23T15:30:00.000+04:002010-03-23T15:35:47.567+04:00

At eleven and 12,13,14,15...years old I was IN LOVE with gorgeous, amazingly fantastic Matt Goss from the boyband Bros. I wore beer bottle tops on my shoes, deliberately ripped my jeans with cheese graters and had a leather jacket filled with more zips than leather. Every poster on my bedroom wall overlapped and I spent every penny I had on a supercool mag Just Seventeen to increase my

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com63tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-54616800262850481822010-03-21T07:58:00.000+04:002010-03-21T07:58:47.828+04:00

We have been on holiday for five months. At stupid o clock one day last October we went to the airport to collect our first visitor, we have returned so many times since that I am on first name terms with the security. I have eaten at every restaurant in town and drank my body weight twice over. Most visitors have overlapped, some stayed a week, some a fortnight and some for a month. A trip

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com63tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-76029983175079378722010-03-16T06:55:00.007+04:002010-03-16T10:17:36.841+04:00

Before you read on I want to make it clear that this post is not aimed at anyone who comments here. Most people who comment on this blog come from America - not sure why but I'm grateful nonetheless. This post is aimed at the lurkers... the people who I know read this regularly. People who live in Muscat, Oman to be precise.Muscat is weird and wonderful - I love it. It's a place that has

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com99tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-42329404621543236632010-03-14T16:46:00.000+04:002010-03-14T16:47:51.334+04:00

I am looking for a good enough excuse for a lack of posts this week - suggestions gratefully recieved.I could tell you that I have been shopping in Dubai, but if I were you I would want to hit me. I could tell you that I'm having to look after a traumatised Max after his first stay at someone elses house - that would be lies, he didn't miss us as half much as we missed him. I could say that I

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com67tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-82642054520883982752010-03-09T15:50:00.000+04:002010-03-09T15:54:09.274+04:00

Mec,I know that your idea of helping with the housework is to lift your legs while I vaccum and you can just about manage to drink a coffee in the same amount of time it takes me to clean the house with a toothbrush. I think I have known you to make the bed once and it didn't take me long to find the secret hiding place for the things you couldn't be bothered to carry into the kitchen.Maybe

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com92tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-44391615403249186722010-03-06T11:10:00.006+04:002010-03-06T12:04:05.671+04:00

Dear Mum,I totally understand that you hate flying, I really do get it but in the not too distant future I will have been here for three years, surely that is enough time for you to pluck up the courage or buy enough valium? Although I was only thirteen when we last flew together I vividly remember you screaming whilst squeezing my arm telling me that the plane was on fire. The fact that it was

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com68tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-25345340205695733032010-03-03T13:30:00.001+04:002010-03-03T13:34:46.591+04:00

I still don't truly get this blogging malarky but I kinda like it. Some of you have been commenting on posts from the very beginning and others have appeared as if by magic. This morning I had a wee peek at the statistics thingy majiggy (which I don't understand, hence my very technical terminology), now I am a little worried about you newcomers because here's a list of the searches people use

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com71tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-70001372523633886852010-03-01T13:10:00.000+04:002010-03-01T13:14:09.182+04:00

I was minding my own business, wishing that the traffic would move faster. Valuable minutes passed as I entertained myself thinking about why I can't sneeze with my eyes open and wondering if sneezing was a valid excuse for a car accident. I moved on to try and find a word that rhymed with orange and contemplated whether Scooby Doos real name was Scoobert. The only thing distracting my OCD

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com72tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-45370798667482902042010-02-28T10:23:00.002+04:002010-02-28T10:31:47.771+04:00

Eight hundred and eighty four days ago my heart sank as I boarded the plane. I had sent you the final text to say goodbye knowing that ten hours later I would be nearly four thousand miles away. Never before had the distance between us been more than a five minute car journey. I knew I could no longer drop in for coffee, pick your kids up from school, babysit when you needed a break or pick up

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com49tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-75845954513551340142010-02-25T11:00:00.004+04:002010-02-27T11:11:22.923+04:00

This weekend I have dumped you. I am sort of sorry. A teeny, tiny pang of guilt lurks in the back of my brain. Teeny, Tiny pang. Blogging has been somewhere at the bottom of the list of:1. No work - I have had a perfect, super duper long weekend off work with my number one addiction - There is nothing better than over-indulging on Mec. 2. Boating with mad Italians - There is something

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com51tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-81058790368936883612010-02-24T09:45:00.001+04:002010-02-24T09:45:17.948+04:00

Dear P!nk,There may have been an auditorium full of idiots getting in my way people, but I could see you wished it was just the two of us. It really annoyed me that every time you tried to climb off that stage to talk to me someone got in your way. I tried to make things easier for you by pushing, fighting and clawing making my way to the front... I know those big guys are there to protect you

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com70tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-57835989275250947112010-02-22T00:30:00.000+04:002010-02-22T12:33:10.960+04:00

Last night I recieved a call from Granny who is home, safe and sound in Bonnie Scotland. There was no 'hello', or 'how are you'... The call simply went like this:Granny: I read your blogMe: Did you see all the lovely things I wrote about you?Granny: AyeMe: Everyone loves you Granny...Granny: AyeSilenceMe: What's wrong?Granny: I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU TOLD EVERYONE I STOLE A PENCIL!!SilenceMe:

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com93tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-8730025616496563812010-02-20T09:48:00.007+04:002010-02-20T11:20:24.633+04:00

On Thursday morning my Aunt called to say that she had taken Granny to see the football match of her neighbours son. As it was SuperGrans last day I thought I should tag along...When I arrived the tournament was well underway. Four matches were taking place at once, the one that we had to watch was for kids aged six to eight. There were parents and kids running around all over the place and I

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com68tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-88703193912058691592010-02-16T14:04:00.001+04:002010-02-16T14:09:04.999+04:00

In two days Super Gran, her husband George and Uncle George (my family find it difficult to come up with original names...) will be heading back to Bonnie Scotland. Their suntan wont take long to fade as in the last month they have a combined sunning time of 3.4 seconds. The holiday weight is firmly implanted on their Scottish tums as they've ensured a diet of nothing but good old Scottish grub

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com57tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-78847871337816189352010-02-14T06:57:00.000+04:002010-02-14T06:58:48.224+04:00

Οι ευτυχείς βαλεντίνοι ημέρα Mec,η ζωή μου δεν είναι οι ίδιοι δεδομένου ότι σας συνάντησα, είμαι ευτυχέστερος από πάντα πριν επειδή καθημερινά φέρνετε την ηλιοφάνεια και το γέλιο. Είστε το πιό καταπληκτικό πρόσωπο έχω συναντηθεί πάντα και λατρεύω κάθε στιγμή που ξοδεύουμε από κοινού.Ξέρω ότι έχουμε το καταπληκτικό μέλλον μπροστά από μας.Σ'αγαπώ,Zek

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com39tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-21128685750891809222010-02-10T07:16:00.008+04:002010-02-21T11:43:27.011+04:00

Granny, G and Uncle are still on their holidays with us and last night we went to the local pub quiz for the second week running. The previous week they had won a bottle of wine for coming third and Granny had her eyes on the number one slot. I'll have a white wine pleaseI should've known it wouldn't go well when the bathroom attendant rugby tackled me on the way to the ladies shouting '

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com56tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-56793292900068867612010-02-08T17:51:00.001+04:002010-02-21T12:01:02.518+04:00

Dear OCD,For thirty-two years you have refused me sleep. The ability to sit still is something you stripped from me the day I learned to walk and I am sure my mind is dangerously close to exploding. My hands are like leather from constant washing and even though you could eat off my floor I really don't think floor eating is that important for most people. I've looked up Obsessive Compulsive

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com69tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-301830443089920732010-02-06T10:45:00.002+04:002010-02-21T11:43:02.482+04:00

Yay I made it. Thanks to all of you...Now I know I promised to post an Eternally Distracted Gone Wild video but I have tried all morning to upload it and for some reason it just won't... Of course I will continue to try ;0)I celebrated the big 400 on a day trip with my wee Scottish Granny who is visiting with her husband and brother. Granny and her brother are supercool. But. Her husband was

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com55tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-56947011835280598252010-02-04T14:20:00.001+04:002010-02-21T11:42:38.263+04:00

I cannot post anything exciting today because I'm too busy peeing my pants at the thought that I may soon have 400 followers... To get one hundred I promised to make 'Eternally Distracted Gone Wild', now I'm worried I will have to post it...Anyhoo. The car is fixed... eventooooolllly but I'm kinda missing the bumpy ride. Kangarooing down the road with Regina Phalange's blocked tubes made me

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com68tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-3305715150793270292010-02-02T11:42:00.001+04:002010-02-21T11:42:16.447+04:00

Last night I drove home in a car that would have been better placed in the Australian outback. Kangarooing down the road at great speed was very impressive and if I'm honest I contemplated missing my turn to continue the adventures for a while... I forced myself to be sensible and took the little jumper home.The next morning I called the AAA to come and collect our little Regina Phalange...AAA:

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com67tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-23971177121824314322010-01-31T08:51:00.007+04:002010-02-21T11:41:53.589+04:00

Living a million trillion miles from home ensures plenty of room for comedy gold moments. If I'm not lost in translation then somebody else is... Living with Mec means spending further time with someone who is also a zillion miles from home and who originates from a place billions of miles from my home. Phew, that's a lot of miles...Being lost in translation frustrates the hell out of some

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com56tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-91103608265822103502010-01-30T06:10:00.001+04:002010-02-21T11:41:29.343+04:00

Dear Granny,I loved seeing your face as you turned the corner to find everyone singing Happy Birthday.I loved watching you kickin' ass on the dancefloor whilst perfecting your spelling of YMCA.I loved looking at you from afar - you held court with everyone.I love that you are 76 years young and still partying hard.I love that you are in the sunshine for your birthday and we could surprise you

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com52tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-70191841663644217952010-01-26T09:10:00.008+04:002010-02-21T11:41:05.470+04:00

Inspired by a post I read at Alix' house...Dear Patience,Thank you for forcing my mouth shut and allowing me to mutter 'hi' when what I really want to do is rugby tackle her to the ground and make her smile - just once. I appreciate that although my blood boils dangerously whilst listening to incessant whinging, not once have you made my ears bleed - yet. I am grateful that you allow me to

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com51tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-61494643390343997542010-01-25T08:52:00.005+04:002010-02-21T11:40:38.664+04:00

I love the innocence of children. I want the ability to say exactly what I think without worry...I was once standing in a queue behind a toddler and her Mum. The little girl tugged on her Mum's sleeve and said loudly "Mummy, when I grow up I want to be an alcoholic like you..."My all time favourites:"It isn't always how you look. Look at me, I'm handsome like anything and I haven't got anyone

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com44tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-81177992902459726772010-01-22T09:55:00.007+04:002010-02-21T11:40:12.395+04:00

Yesterday morning I sat computer in hand, looking at Mec for inspiration. That's not true. I was actually listening carefully for a little 'lost in translation' for my post. I wasn't sure how I could write a whole post on the fact that Mec got 'goonbumps all over because Max was tingling Mec's ear'...So there I was waiting for something to happen... and Max flew away.We have been in a dilemna

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com51tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-79467566982801008982010-01-20T09:15:00.001+04:002010-02-21T11:39:24.581+04:00

Mec returned from work with a bag of strange powder, a huge smile and a pot of honey...Hold your filthy mind for a teeny, tiny second...Me: What is it?Mec: It's medicine that makes your testicles wake upMe: What??Mec: It makes you feel nice inside and wakes your testicles up...I realise that Mec is waving hands frantically around the torsoMe: You mean intestines?Mec: Yes, testicles.Mec runs

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com61tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-60580515700842528712010-01-18T08:51:00.009+04:002010-02-21T11:38:52.738+04:00

I always hated tag at school. Why waste energy chasing someone around and around when you can just stand still, wait for someone to pass and jump on the bugger? I witnessed too many skinny kids falling over, crying and running to the nurse... I preferred to prop up the bike sheds with my ten pack of ciggies and the cool fat people who didn't want to run.The same reasoning was applied to my

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com51tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-89081735305289746292010-01-17T06:20:00.003+04:002010-02-21T11:38:24.133+04:00

On Wednesday night I decided that hopping on one foot would be good exercise. My solution was to smash my toe. Exercise for the week. Check.Apparently my self-diagnosis was not good enough, three days later I was made to go for an x-ray.Me: Can I book an appointment with a doctor?Receptionist: Why?Me: I think I have broken my toeReceptionist: How old is your child?Me: I don't have a child

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com56tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-25790832717834672192010-01-13T08:06:00.001+04:002010-02-21T11:38:01.497+04:00

The takeaway number is on my 'favourites' list and the 'torture chamber' looks like a laundry room. My body and my fat have become such good friends that they don't want to part - who am I to break up such a long-standing relationship? I have tried to lose weight, I swear I have...but every time I do the idiot finds me again. I have decided that too many seconds have been spent worrying about

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com61tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-10326819048843355772010-01-10T15:45:00.003+04:002010-02-21T11:37:34.719+04:00

I can't believe I made 100.The End.Ok, Ok, I really should write something else...Mec. Lovely Mec is the person I have to thank for reaching this milestone so quickly.When I first decided to blog I promised, hand on heart, that Mec would not feature in any of my posts...ooops! Those fabbarooney people who have followed this blog from the start will know that on the VERY odd occasion I have

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com69tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-9602427239582796772010-01-09T06:22:00.006+04:002010-02-21T11:37:02.911+04:00

Mec and I spent last night rocking out on guitar hero. Kings of Rock we are not. There we were with our plastic guitars feebly strumming along to the Kings of Leon and I am sure I heard Max laugh. He turned his back on us. He may only be two but I think our feathered son already thinks we are embarrassing parents...no doubt the next time he is out he will eat the guitar.Being an acearooney

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com46tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-11362801036441300362010-01-07T09:22:00.015+04:002010-02-21T11:36:29.581+04:00

I slept as though I had been knocked out. Maybe I was?...Mec made my dinner last night. Hmmmm food for thought...Anyway, anyway, anyway. Today is a 'nothing' day, the only thing I have to worry about is the fact that I can't type properly. This has a lot to do with the fact that last night Max, our feathered son, decided to bury his beak into my finger and swing for dear life...through

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com41tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-4486957530913620262010-01-06T09:42:00.006+04:002010-02-21T11:35:58.953+04:00

When I saw you slam on your brakes I was worried mostly about the fact that I had been watching your infant bouncing around on the lap of your wife in the passenger seat. Two toddlers were jumping around playing with toy swords in the back seat and you were chatting merrily on your mobile phone. The minibus behind me was so close that I could smell the burning rubber as his brakes

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com29tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-31155137760236547322010-01-04T15:52:00.001+04:002010-02-21T11:35:34.485+04:00

A colleague disappeared with a bag of microwavable popcorn promising the team a lovely afternoon snackette. She returned three days later with an inferno of steaming crispy bits and the fire brigade...As she handed over the health hazard she said "I think I left it on too long".In reality all who live here know that she would have to leave it on for three weeks before the fire brigade turned up.

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com38tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-83861823929626324472010-01-02T15:44:00.011+04:002010-02-21T11:35:08.896+04:00

This New Year we decided to do things a little differently. The idea of dressing up, waiting around for a taxi and being surrounded by people we didn't want was enough to make us think of an alternative...and you can't get more isolated than the desert...Camping. Well kind of. Camping in air conditioned 'apartments' with proper toilets and showers - you remember I have OCD right?. Mec and I

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com33tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-60144163219416954662009-12-30T10:24:00.010+04:002010-02-21T11:34:45.435+04:00

Every single year I make resolutions that are broken within minutes. You know the kind where you vow to stop drinking and the very next second you hold up your vodka and drunkenly spit at your friends whilst chinking glasses and shouting 'cheers to that'. I am seriously fed up of resolving to stop smoking, even my brain giggles when I think it...promises to exercise more and be productive

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com28tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-9773792338870439752009-12-27T16:48:00.006+04:002010-02-21T11:34:20.035+04:00

Pedrina has gone. Her time in our home is over. She wasn't naughty you understand, just getting a little old and tired.In the evenings she would drop things all over our floor and I spent many a night feeling glad I wasn't epileptic what with the ten sets of lights she carried. Pedrina was gorgeous but nine foot of greenery stood in the middle of your lounge is not great for long - even the

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com29tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-32921146484123729962009-12-23T13:17:00.007+04:002010-02-21T11:33:50.820+04:00

It has rained on and off for a few days. In any other country that wouldn't matter but here everything floods and it appears necessary to drive with your hazard lights on constantly - whether there is a hazard or not. I am not sure what's worse, people who drive everywhere so slowly you could walk passed, people who drive so far up your ass that they are sitting on your rear seat or the people

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com22tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-9447284681323675332009-12-21T14:40:00.001+04:002010-02-21T11:33:15.094+04:00

Yesterday Mec and I went on a boat with the scariest lady I know...It wasn't until we were bobbing around in the middle of the sea that our mad Italian friend chose to tell us that she was a parrot-killer. With madness in her eyes and a wicked grin on her face she told us that she had killed two pet parrots as a child...We were in the middle of nowhere with a murderer...Well, kind of.Actually

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com18tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-48406808720529243342009-12-15T07:26:00.016+04:002010-02-21T11:32:22.383+04:00

Mec: Do you think Pedrina is lonely?Me: No, she is dead.Mec: What?Me: She is dying in our house as we speak...Mec: NooooooooooooMe: Yep. She was cut from the ground and brought to us to die.Mec: Nooooo, don't listen Max...Pedrina is not dying. (finger in my face)Mec: SHE is LYING!I can assure you, the Christmas tree is dying...

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com17tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-74653238148252242632009-12-14T22:35:00.003+04:002010-02-21T11:31:54.934+04:00

Mec: Baby, I wanna have children...Me: nervous laughterMec: I promise I'll be good...Me: wondering how long I can stay silentMec: I will clean them...Me: nervous laughterMec: I will feed them...Me and Max: Yeah right!!

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com23tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-69057251407321734392009-12-07T10:36:00.011+04:002010-02-21T11:31:26.129+04:00

I have recovered from my previous post, the guy is still a jerk but what can you do? I am happy in the knowledge that the Silver Surfer (Granny) has said she will kick his ass, that's all I need to know...Back to Mecisms and happy lovliness...This morning I arrived at work and received this call:Mec: Can I borrow your shirt clippers?Me: Shirt clippers?Mec: Yes!Me: What?Mec: The things to

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com23tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-82099929615977627752009-12-06T13:31:00.004+04:002010-02-21T11:29:51.175+04:00

Dear Bumbling Idiot,The fact that I am writing this makes me dislike you even more. You are stealing precious minutes of my time...minutes that I would prefer to spend throwing up, being hit or something equally more pleasant than talking about you.Calling you an idiot would be an insult to all stupid people, you are about as much use as a Betamax. When I first met you I told you to just be

Eternally Distractedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11692830050447764941noreply@blogger.com40tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5150378762612387380.post-59083074878402606942009-12-04T13:13:00.010+04:002010-01-06T11:01:26.217+04:00

Yesterday two fabulous friends of ours knocked on the door at stupid-o-clock proudly dragging a real Norwegian Christmas tree behind them. Mec and I decided that this year the tree would be called Pedrina - last year we had Pedro and being a boy he was very messy, this year we wanted a girl...Max took his time to understand Pedrina. She is very big and butch and I think she scared our little

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